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If you work nonstop without a break...worry about offending others and back down too easily...explain too much when asked for information....or "poll" your friends and colleagues before making a decision, chances are you have been bypassed for promotions and ignored when you expressed your ideas. Although you may not be aware of it, girlish behaviors such as these are sabotaging your career!

Dr. Lois Frankel reveals why some women roar ahead in their careers while others stagnate. She's spotted a unique set of behaviors--101 in all--that women learn in girlhood that sabotage them as adults. Now, in this groudbreaking guide, she helps you eliminate these unconscious mistakes that could be holding you back--and offers invaluable coaching tips you can easily incorporate into your social and business skills. If you recognize and change the behaviors that say "girl" not "woman", the results will pay off in carrer opportunites you never thought possible--and in an image that identifies you as someone with the power and know-how to occupy the corner office.

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Lois P. Frankel, Ph.D., is the President of Corporate Coaching International. She is a sought-after speaker. Her websites are www.drloisfrankel.com; www.gr8speakers.com; and www.corporatecoachingintl.com

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从女孩到女人

[1]

允许自己从女孩变成女人。

告诉你自己，你不仅被允许，而且有资格按照有利于实现自己目标的方式行动。

[2]

把自己的梦想变得直观明显。

[3]

反驳你脑子里那个害怕的声音。

[4]

创造舆论。

在领导力课程上，我们经常作一个常规练习，就是要求参加者用25个字描述一下，他们希望别人怎样看待自己，然后列出能让自己梦想成真的行为。

[5]

寻求反馈。

如果你担心自己在某些方面举止不当，不妨向一位信赖的朋友或同事寻求反馈。避免提出以“是”或“否”回答的问题（例如：“你是否认为我不协调？”）。试着提一些开放式的问题，帮助你弄清别人是怎样看待你的（例如：“告诉我，我在会议上的哪些举动会帮助或者阻碍我实现目标？”）。

[6]

别指望十全十美。

绽放：女性职场能量第一书

女性不如男性熟练的往往是这两个方面：

一是不知道那条假想的界线在什么地方，

二是不了解潜在的规则。

1. 不懂游戏规则

——记住，职场， 说穿了就是一场游戏。有游戏规则，有边界，有赢家和输家。

想一想你任职的公司有哪些游戏规则，把它们列出一张单子。一旦开出了这张单子，你从此就会用不同的眼光来观察公司内人们之间的互动、公司的会议纪要、开会程序等等。例如，有些企业的职场规则包括：不能与老板意见相左；每个人每周至少加班十小时；就算你对了，彬彬有礼却更重要；不管出现什么情况，都必须按时完成任务；严格遵守预算；顾客至上等等。你不妨一边列表一边思考，比较一下自己平日的表现与这些规则之间的差距。

参加竞技性体育活动，不管是网球、垒球还是高尔夫球。体育运动可帮助你学习游戏语言。

2. 只打老太太球，怕出界

——不能让球出界，但要敢于擦边

请注意，把该做的事情全做了，这算不得主动，只能算完成分内的工作。在她的新职位上，管理层希望她肩负起更多的职责，并且独立决策。当我向她提出这点建议时，她说她不想越权，...

This is an area where guys really get it. They know when good enough is good enough and move on to the next thing. Where do you think they find the time to network, go to lunch with colleagues, and attend professional association meetings? They do it by realizing it's more efficient to go back and correct a mistake (if there is one) than to keep reviewing a project to possibly catch one.

Coaching tips:

- Consciously reduce the amount of time you work on any given day or spend on any one piece of work. If you know you have only one hour ro proof a report, then you'll do it in an hour. If you leave the schedule open-ended, perfection-seeking behaviour will result in your putting in more hours at work than necessary.

- Ask for feedback. Before putting in extra time on that might already be a...

The workplace is exactly that --- a game. It has rules, boudaries, strategies, winners, and losers. Woman tend to approach work more like an event (picnic, concert, fund-raiser).

.......

Her polite, laid-back way of managing and interacting with others was now seen as weak and indecisive.

......

Rules of the game change...

Sharing appropriate amounts of personal information enables others to see the human side of you and, in turn, builds relationships.

Schedule times throughout the day to drop by a colleague's office for a few minutes of casual conversation. When someone drops by yours, stop what you're doing and invite him or her in.

Stop volunteering for low-profile, low-impact assignments. If necessary, sit on your hand rather than raise it.

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